Have we not already realized that it’s always the same story, the great “one-trick pony”? We look each other in the eyes after a vulnerable moment from one, the other, or both, and with real intended sincerity we remind ourselves that we are not alone in our brokenness, in our fallen-ness, and that shame should not bind us.
We walk away feeling good for a moment, but soon subliminally convince ourselves that we are different, but not different in a good way. We convince ourselves that we are unworthy due to our circumstances, our failings, our weaknesses. Not that our weaknesses and failings are not something to come before Father in deep repentance over, but that we … WE, have allowed our failings to separate us from Him. In our “great wisdom” (sarcasm) we have judged ourselves to be unworthy of His love or affection, never mind His forgiveness.
I grew up as an international missionary kid, a TCK, a Third-Culture-Kid as many liked to be defined. From the age of 10 until I finished High School at 18, I grew up at a boarding school in Southern India. Although in more recent years, with state and local governmental spying and intervention it has become increasingly difficult to be a Christ follower in India, the early 90s was a wonderful time to be there. During those formational years in the life of a teenage boy I spent countless hours at dusk on the flat roofs of the dormitories, the smell of eucalyptus in the air, watching flying foxes jump from tree to tree, wrestling my immature understanding of theology with Father, Jesus, well with whatever I thought He looked like at the time.
With worship blasting in my ears from my Walkman cassette player I’d go between tears of gratitude, quiet moments of contemplation and shouts of anger and frustration.
At times Father would feel so close but then at times so distant, arrogantly believing that the issue of proximity was down to His flakiness rather than on my posturing!
But then shame would creep in, reminding me of my many indiscretions, those more recent and even those that were long covered by the blood of Christ, poured out upon over many such quiet roof top meetings. You see, Satan IS the great “one-trick pony”! His arsenal comprises of accusation and slander; his power bestowed through the authority we place in his hands when we choose to believe the deceit.
The question is, will you belligerently refuse to believe the lie? Are you willing to make the decision to posture yourself “under the shadow of His wing” (Psalm 91:4 paraphrased).
The reason we should regularly gather together as Christians is yes, to give worship and adoration where worship and adoration is due, but it’s also to regularly speak truth over one another, to remind each other that Father is as close and present as He ever was and ever will be…the great constant in our tumultuous lives!
At some point you have to just decide whether you believe it or not but the problem is, you can’t just take part of it. It’s like randomly placing only 220 pieces of a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle and expecting to get the full picture. You will only “hear in part and see in part” (1 Corinthians 13:9-12).
You either accept that He loves you completely or you’ll miss it.
But believe me, Father loves you. He’s actually right next to you. Find someone, anyone, that regularly speaks the truth of Scripture over you and then stick to them like glue. But ultimately, YOU must choose to lean in!
Please, please, please, LEAN IN.